So, um, sometimes I can be a little dramatic...

At first, the whole "too slow for the half marathon" thing didn't bother me. I meant what I wrote in my last blog post.

And then Pete and I were texting, and I told him about it, and he was like, "Seriously? You're THAT slow? I thought you were a real runner... You're like one of those old people doing laps at the mall."

And then I went for what was supposed to be a 4 mile run, but I was really struggling and going so slow, and this girl gave me a judgmental look, so I stopped after 2 and sat on my couch and decided I was done with "running."

I was still upset the next day. Pete and I had another conversation in which he supported my decision and suggested I try P90X instead. I bought diet food when I went grocery shopping and told Kristin I was just going to diet.

"That's fine, but is that why you were running in the first place?"

She had a point. Losing weight was never my reason for running.

My original reason for running- staying in shape for canyoneering- ended up not paying off. I don't think I was in any better shape than I was this summer.

But somewhere along the way, my reason for running changed. I wasn't thinking about canyoneering or losing weight; I was just thinking about how good it made me feel.

I was serious about quitting running for a few days. But yesterday, I REALLY wanted to go for a run. I couldn't stop thinking about it today. I'm so mad that the weather is so ridiculously cold; now I'm going to have to wait till Wednesday to run. I see snow in the forecast, so I'm crossing my fingers that I'm still able to run.

This latest little crisis has taught me a few things:

1. I don't think I could quit running, even if I wanted to. I have an addictive personality; apparently I can now add running to my list of addictions.

2. There are going to be some runs that just totally suck, and I need to just get over it and try again the next day rather than overreacting.

3. I was reminded of the incredible support system I have in my life. I have such encouraging friends who offer everything from tough love ("STOP LETTING STUPID BOYS MAKE YOUR DECISIONS FOR YOU!") to sweet words to name calling ("You are a runner, penis head!") to threats. ("If you don't snap out of this, I'm calling Joe!")